Trip Report: 2/21 – 2/28
Since this was our first trip to Hedo III, and we’ve been to Hedo II a couple of times before, we’ll try to compare and contrast the resorts for you as we go through our report.
We flew AJ to and from MoBay. We have to give AJ very high marks! In the past, flight times seemed to be more suggestions than commitments and delays were frequent and lengthy. This time, our flight actually left the gate a tad early, and we landed in MoBay a good 25 minutes ahead of schedule. Our trip was off to a great start! Customs was a breeze and our baggage found it’s way to us in record time. All things seemed lined up perfectly. That is, of course, until we boarded the bus from hell.
The road to Runaway Bay is pretty bad. Some areas have new pavement down but those areas are few and far between. The bus we were on had a suspension problem and it rocked back and forth if the bus exceeded 20 MPH. We stopped for beer and then again at Breezes to let off a bunch of folks. The driver and his trusty sidekick managed to screw up the luggage so we spent 20 to 25 minutes at Breezes sorting out who’s bag belonged to who. By the time we got to Hedo, the bus ride had taken about 2 hours and 20 minutes.
After kissing the ground in thanks of finally making it to Hedo, we got in line for check-in. Kudos to Hedo for actually making check-in easy. They originally said our room wasn’t ready yet, so we checked for ourselves and determined that it was in fact ready. We got our key moments later, got nekkid and headed for our first Hummingbird! We saw no advantage at Hedo III over Hedo II when it came to getting through check-in. Both can be a challenge and require a little ingenuity in order to complete quickly.
Now a little background on the group we were with. Our group consisted of nearly 500 people, almost all couples, and all lifestyle. As a result, Hedo allowed the resort to have many more nude areas, optional or otherwise, than they typically would. Some took full advantage of that while others did not. The Quad area was 90% naked at all times so even though we were in the 200 block, we were able to leave our room without clothing if we so chose.
The rooms at Hedo III are a little nicer than at Hedo II. Our complaints with our room included the remote for the TV didn’t work, but then again, who the heck wants to watch TV anyway. Our shower also leaked from the room above. It seemed that if the people above us used their Jacuzzi, the ceiling would leak. The only other complaint was that the mirror over our bed was not in good condition. Overall, I would only give a slight edge to Hedo III and that’s mostly due to the abundance of windows and the fact that the air conditioning is far easier to work.
The shower was weak and water pressure was lacking. One day, the water main broke near the resort and that entire part of the island was without water. Thankfully, and miraculously, the water main was fixed within hours. Hedo III had better control over the temperature of the showers than Hedo II had, although Hedo II had better overall pressure. We give no advantage to either place.
The one noticeable difference is the fact that the showers at Hedo III are in front of a giant window. Those that want to be a little adventuresome can leave their shades open and shower for all to see. We caught a few very nice shows while lounging in the quad hot tub and gave a few shows too! Woohoo! Advantage: Hedo III!!!!
The Quad area was very nice. We were in 221, which is directly above the hot tub. We had no trouble sleeping at any time. Even thought the parties typically lasted until 5:00 am, the noise was easily drowned out by keeping our fan on. The nice part about being in the Quad during a nude takeover is that we had a very nice area right outside our door to use and at rock bottom prices too! For the record, Hedo did not allow nudity in any of the restaurants, reception area, shops, by the main pool, or in the piano bar or disco. Well, the last two were loosely enforced let’s say!
In addition to being at Hedo with a group of 500, we also had numerous friends that we knew from our area that were there. We found the crowd to be super, vibrant and very willing to make new friends. As a result, we could always find a fun party to join up with, find any number of our friends to chat with, or lay quietly, or not so quietly, by ourselves.
There have been other trip reports comparing the crowds at Hedo II versus Hedo III but in our opinion, part of the fun of the crowd is what you make of it. In any given week, you could find the crowd fantastic or completely unacceptable, and much of that is based upon your expectations. There were only a few couples that had made reservations before our group reserved 250 rooms. We saw one couple in the lobby demanding their money back for having to be amongst a bunch of “swingers”. They couldn’t have been more pissed off and if they tried. That’s a shame frankly.
The strange part of their reaction to the group was that PDA’s were not as prevalent as we had seen during non-lifestyle weeks. The slut wear was fantastic and first rate all week. While there were certainly moments where the hot tub got, well, “busy”, there were far fewer moments like that then we had seen with other groups. To the couple that demanded their money back and went storming off, we can only wonder what they expected out of Hedo anyway? The moral of the story is that at Hedo, it’s all about the freedom to do as you please, as long as you don’t hurt anyway else. If you’re offended by something that someone is doing, don’t watch.
Let’s also clear up what might be a misconception with lifestyle groups. One of the interesting dynamics is that with a lifestyle group we found that they all were far more polite and respectful than some other couples or single guys we’ve seen during other weeks we’ve been at Hedo. The few single guys that were there were beyond polite frankly. While my wife had been grabbed or groped without her permission during past trips to Hedo during non-lifestyle weeks, it never happened this time. There were absolutely no Vinnies or Wallies to deal with. The only trouble we heard of all week was due to a bartender in the disco getting overly friendly, and that was dealt with properly by the guest with the management of the resort. Lifestyle couples are not insatiable beasts looking to quench some kind of unquenchable thirst with every person that walks by. They are very careful and very discriminating group. Maybe the hardest thing for someone to deal with being at Hedo during a lifestyle week is not being asked.
The group we were with also had much of its own fun. While we spent most days wandering between the main beach area, to the nude pool, to the quad, and then to the Scotch Bonnet or the main dining room for snacks, but when we needed organized activities, our group had their own daily games each day around 1:00 pm in the Quad area. Those were a lot of fun and very well organized.
The funniest game was called Spank the Monkey. Now, let us explain that quickly before you’re minds all run amuck – LOL. One of the single guys in the group got dressed as a monkey. Contestants answered trivia questions. If you got the trivia question right, you picked a number from a hat and spanked the monkey (the single guy) whatever number of times the slip said. If you got the question wrong, you got the spanking, via a paddle. Don’t worry though, nobody got spanked that didn’t want to and the prizes handed out to each contestant ranged from a T-shirt to a free week at Hedo. Not bad, eh?
Each night the group had it’s own themes. Saturday was more of an introduction night for everyone out on the main terrace. Sunday was glamour night and everyone did a great job getting into the spirit of the moment. Monday was drag queen and slut night. Although not a lot of the guys opted to cross dress, it was a lot of fun to watch. Tuesday was PJ night, as always.
Wednesday was leather and lace night, although 90% of the crowd wore leather. I and four other guys were led to the front of the piano bar to sing a rendition of macho man while dressed in leather and being spanked by our mistress for the evening. It may well have been the worst rendition of macho man ever performed, but nobody seemed to mind. Thursday was toga night but we’ll talk a little more about that next. Friday was bare-as-you-dare-in-white night. There were a few new people starting to come into the resort that night and it was really obvious since they were in the piano bar or disco in jeans and t-shirts while everyone else was dressed, minimally, in white.
This was our first trip where we had the unfortunately opportunity to check out Hedo and Jamaica’s health care system. On Tuesday, I (him) had a situation develop and needed to see the nurse. It was something that she referred to the on-call doctor. If you don’t know, Hedo has a doctor that they call in anytime there’s something that the nurse can’t handle herself. By the way, ask the nurse about the giant dildo she has in the cabinet above her desk!
The doctor came in and administered a brief exam before giving me some medications. The doctor at Hedo costs $165 and you can pay with Master Card or Visa if you choose. As luck would have it, a good friend of ours was with us who is also a pharmacist. He took a look at what was prescribed and while the condition called for multi-symptom relief, the medication was only for pain relief. Odd, to say the least. Unfortunately, our friend the pharmacist had to leave later that day so I went ahead and followed the doctor’s advice.
By Thursday evening, around 10:00 pm, things had gotten much worse. We went to see the nurse and she called the doctor. After a brief consultation on the phone, he told us to go to the emergency room at St. Anne’s Bay hospital. Hedo called a taxi, which cost $60. The taxi driver was very nice and got us there quickly and safely. During the ride, we called our doctor to find out what we needed to do and what questions we should ask. Thankfully, we showed up at the hospital armed with some suggestions to help guide the process or it would have been a wasted trip.
The hospital was nowhere near what you would expect to see in the States. To get help, you first fill out a form and register yourself, which costs $60 and you can use your credit card there too. Then you wait, and wait, and wait some more. There were only 3 or 4 other patients waiting for help when we arrived. Our taxi driver went to complain and got us in about 90 minutes after we first showed up. The doctor looked like he was either half asleep or drunk frankly. He did a brief examination and issued a prescription that we had to fill the following day (another $50 cab ride). The medication was $371. I almost passed out until I realized they were talking Jamaican currency.
As it turns out, every medication prescribed missed the mark. The one prescribed by the hospital, our doctor in the states couldn’t even identify. Considering he’s rated the best doctor in our city, that’s quite the condemnation of the medical system of Jamaica. So for nearly $300 in taxi rides and doctor bills, we ended up with little to show for the effort.
Now, to be perfectly fair, I will give Hedo very high marks for their efforts to follow-up and their efforts to help. The nurse called us every four hours from Thursday night on to check on us. She did a tremendous job with what she had available to her. I felt much better knowing that she was there and honestly cared. However, since I was ailing until I returned home, it left us having to tone down our fun quite a bit.
If you are traveling to Hedo, we highly recommend having your physician(s) contact information handy at any moment. You’ll feel much more comfortable knowing that your physician is in the loop and can at least give you a little advice. Be advised that your insurance more than likely means nothing in Jamaica too. You’ll be paying cash / credit card everywhere you go. You can make a claim when you return home only.
Cell phones work great in Jamaica. We have Cingular and were quoted anywhere from $1.00 a minute to $1.50 a minute depending on where we were calling. Again, from an emergency situation perspective especially, we recommend having a cell phone that works. What we should have been doing was having our physician on the line with each Jamaican doctor at the time of the examination and consulting on what we should have been prescribed, instead of what we were prescribed. We assumed we were getting proper treatment and that was a mistake we won’t repeat again.
We found the restaurants at Hedo III to be the functional equivalents of Hedo II. We know that many people find the food substandard but we had no problems. There are things on the menu every night that we found delicious frankly. One of our biggest challenges with every Hedo vacation we’ve ever taken is weight gain, not weight loss! We liked the Japanese restaurant but it’s hard to do that more than twice during a week. The Scotch Bonnet was nice for late lunches. At Hedo III, the Scotch Bonnet is your primary place to get jerk chicken. We rate Robert’s Grill at Hedo II as having much better jerk chicken but we loved our waitress at Hedo III.
Pastafari is the same at both places. We loved spicey food and Pastafari didn’t disappoint. Pastafari had lobster on the menu on Thursday night. We also liked the main dining room. There was a large beach party on Friday night and Hedo had lobster (yes, again) and the works out all night. That was also fantastic! Over all, we can’t give an edge to Hedo II or III when it comes to food. We liked them both.
As for the bars, Hedo III just seems to have more options. In fact, they do have 1 more bar available plus an impromptu bar they set up on the prude beach during the day. Service during the days, even for a resort that was at capacity, was good. There were only a couple of times all week where we couldn’t get a drink quickly. Evenings are another story however. The main bar outside the dining room seemed to close around midnight. The piano bar also closed around 1:00 am which left the quad pool and the disco bars. The disco was not well staffed and could hardly keep up with the demand. With the size group that we had, we feel that Hedo II would have a similar problem with keeping up so we can’t give an edge to either place but would have preferred that Hedo staff the disco bar much better. Many people simply gave up on the disco due to a lack of service. Hedo just needs to put more people on the job when large groups come in.
The piano bar was fun and vibrant. The music was enjoyable and even though some of the efforts to sing (like mine) sounded akin to someone swinging a dead cat into a tree, it’s all good mon’. It doesn’t matter how you sound, just belt it out. Several people in our group gave virtuoso performances but the best were the ones that stood on top of the piano and proudly did their best. We like the piano bar at Hedo II better than Hedo III simply because it seems to have more room. We found no perceptible difference between players. During Friday’s bare as you dare night, some of the ladies in our group started a conga line that snaked it’s way around the piano bar, up onto the railing and over the piano.
The disco at Hedo III is more fun than at Hedo II. Having the bar in the same room meant that it was a bit smaller and a bit more crowded but that can be fun too. Being in a group of mostly couples meant that we didn’t have any of the same problems we’ve had in the past at Hedo II. The fun was non-stop and was intense. We got some use out of the cage and it was fun to see the ladies in our group all dancing on the bar together. The music seemed good to us but we realize that is a personal preference. Overall, we just liked the disco at Hedo III much more.
The grounds at Hedo III are nice but not as lush as at Hedo II. That said, it was very easy for us to find our way around at Hedo III. All the rooms are in an area that is easy to get to. If you cut between or through the buildings, you can be anywhere at Hedo III in 5 minutes or less. We give no advantage to either place, although we did like Hedo III’s brighter buildings and tile surfaces better.
The beach at Hedo II beats Hedo III hands down. If you simply must have a beach, you won’t like Hedo III. The nice part of the nude beach at Hedo III is its seclusion. Along about Thursday, it’s nice to get away from the crowd for a moment or two. The piers on the nude side at Hedo III are nice as well to lay out on. Pretty much every chair in the resort was taken all week due to the crowd but we never had any trouble getting a chair if we got up early or stayed up late and left our towels on the chair.
Let’s talk towels. Hedo III beats the pants off Hedo II. Even with the resort packed, the towels were plentiful, most of the time, and much nicer. The thread bare towels at Hedo II are a joke compared to Hedo III.
The slide at Hedo III is similar to Hedo II. There are other activities like tennis and what not but we had no use for those things so we can’t comment on them. The workout room at Hedo III is smaller than at Hedo II, or so it seems. Given the crowd, it was hard to get any time on any of the machines. Hedo II gets the nod here as it does have a little more room.
When it comes to hot tubs, the hot tub on the nude side at Hedo II is better than at Hedo III. There are more hot tubs at Hedo III but they are all smaller. As a result, the hot tub party isn’t as wild at Hedo III but you get more options on where to have your party. Advantage still goes to Hedo II.
On Wednesday around 1:00 pm, the group chartered the largest catamaran on the island for a 200 person (or thereabouts) nude cruise. We took buses to Ocho Rios and then were escorted down to the boat. It was a great day. The ride lasted about 4 hours but was so much fun that time seemed to fly by. In general, the cruise was much wilder than the resort was all week. There was dancing and fun and pictures and fun and more dancing and more fun. Without a doubt, this was the best cruise we’ve ever been on. The highlight was when all the ladies got up to the front of the boat for one giant picture and a bit of an impromptu dance line. We got back to the resort around 6:30 or 7:00 pm, a little tired and definitely a little tipsy.
One of the real highlights from our trip was the school supply collection. We worked with Michelle Davis at the resort and our group did a very nice job getting into the spirit of giving. One of the schools that Hedo sponsors is the Windsor Girls’ Home in St. Anne’s Bay. We had the opportunity to accompany Michelle and LeeJay Williams over on Thursday to deliver the supplies. That was a very emotional experience.
The girls at Windsor come from very tough circumstances. Abusive parents and abandonment are common. They sleep three to a room and what struck us immediately is that there are no dressers in their rooms since they don’t have any personal items to put away. They have their school outfits and that’s about it. Otherwise they have no possessions and little love in this world outside the home. Hedo helps greatly by encouraging their female employees to act as big sisters to the girls. LeeJay’s little sister had her birthday the day before we visited and her present was when her mother showed up to visit, finally. This girl was so cute. She had thread through her ears because she couldn’t afford earrings.
If you can at all help, we strongly encourage you to call Michelle in the PR department and see what they need. Windsor also teaches the girls skills they can use when they must leave the school at age 18. So they teach cooking, sewing, hair styling and beauty in addition to general education. The girls are between 12 and 18 and could use shoes, school supplies, cooking supplies and just about anything else you can imagine frankly. The need is great but the only way it’ll ever get better is if we all help them take one step at a time.
There were plenty of water sports to do at Hedo III as there are at Hedo II. We aren’t divers so we can’t comment on that. We did take advantage of some of the water equipment and that all seemed to be in a good state of repair. No advantage to Hedo II or Hedo III, unless you are a diver.
General safety seemed to be well managed at Hedo III. While security was not always apparent, the crowd was very well behaved. There was one incident on Saturday during which two women foolishly ventured out into the ocean from the nude side beach during some very rough seas. Security should have been monitoring the beach better. A couple of friends of ours literally had to save them before they were tossed against the rocks any worse than they already had been. During rough seas, there is a very strong current that runs between the openings out at the end of the piers on the nude beach. It’ll take you outside the safety area much faster than you can imagine. Watch out!
One of the challenges of Hedo III is there are more areas to hang out. At Hedo II, if you’re nude, you’re sitting on the nude beach or in the nude pool. As a result, you’re shouting distance away from anyone you want to reach. At Hedo III it’s a bit more difficult to keep a group together. People could be out on the main beach, the nude pool, nude beach, or Quad. Part of the allure of Hedo though is making new friends too so while this presents a challenge, it’s also an opportunity.
Finally, we found the employees to be generally in good spirits. There were a few sour faces here and there but I don’t smile all day at work either so I can hardly fault someone for having an off day once in a while. Our maid was wonderful and we found the staff in general to be very gracious hosts for all of us. The people that worked on the catamaran were very good natured about all of our fun too. When we went to the Windsor Girls Home, our taxi driver asked us if this was our first trip to Jamaica. We replied that it was our fourth at which point he said with a big smile, “well, then welcome back home Mon”. He was right. We are home when were in Jamaica.
All week long, we had to say goodbye to friends as they left. On Saturday afternoon, it became our turn to go. My wife once again got all misty eyed as we gave our friends a final hug. A large percentage of our group all left on the same day so we rode on a bus full of Hedo people, making no stops on the way back to MoBay. Since we had a much better bus, we made the ride in 1 hour and about 15 minutes. Some of our friends who left a little later on Saturday evening took a taxi and they made the ride in 65 minutes.
When it comes to transportation to and from MoBay, Hedo II gets higher marks here for the next couple of years as the road is much easier and safer frankly. However, in a couple of years, Hedo III will be right there. We had thought about taking a puddle jumper to and from Hedo but the runway (cow pasture) was washed out several weeks before and the repair efforts? Well, soon come Mon. Given that a taxi is $70 and can be shared, and the plane is $90 per person, one has to seriously question whether or not it makes any sense to take the plane if you can make the ride in 65 minutes. If you like the view and enjoy plane rides, it makes all the sense in the world of course. But from a pure time perspective, it is possible to make the trip efficiently by bus, although it is a pretty bumpy ride.
We give our group extremely high marks for all there efforts. It’s so unfair to compare one group against another so we just won’t. We’ve savored the friendships we’ve made in our previous Hedo vacations and wouldn’t trade those for anything. The group this year was tremendous as well. We were treated with respect and courtesy throughout the week. We were very impressed with the way in which everyone conducted themselves. There wasn’t sex breaking out all over the resort as some might fear, or some might hope for. It was just a very fun and very decent group of regular people that all came to Hedo for a chance to be kids again. Words can not describe how we feel right now after a week with the group. Maybe the best indication is that we already signed up for next year! Oh by the way, so did 80 – 90 other couples too. So a year in advance, 1/3 of the rooms at Hedo III for that week are already taken. Let the planning begin!
As is our custom, we never call people out by name in our trip reports. We fear leaving someone out as much as we respect everyone’s privacy, including our own. So we’ll simply thank our group in general. We appreciate all the people that worked so hard to plan the week, the people that helped out with the activities and that sacrificed part of their time to make the week better for us all. To the members of the group, we thank you for being so accepting of us, for being courteous and for being mischievous too! We had a completely good time. Everyone made us feel included and part of the fun.
To our dear friends, and you know who you are, we love you guys. You shared our joys, were good listeners when we needed it, forgave us if we got too crazy and generally provided the kind of support that people need to feel totally free. You’re the greatest group a couple of people like us could ever hope for. You made our vacation so wonderful! Despite the medical challenges, we had our best week ever. It gives us great incentive to work at our jobs, to take care of our kids and our house, to be responsible for the next 51 weeks so we can make sure we’re ready to go completely nuts again and party with you all next year! Let’s just make sure that next year’s trip leaves us all wondering how we ever survived the week! ;)
Respect,