5/23-5/31 – 5th Trip to Hedo III
We absolutely love the resort and the people, and that’s why we keep returning. Every visit is different, but they all have special memories. We don’t travel with a group, nor have we gone back with people we’ve met on previous trips – we like going on our own schedule with a totally open mind to meet new people. This trip was a bit different in that we actually emailed a small group of folks from Denny’s site beforehand. And it was a big positive! We made some very good friends….. Thank you Denny for an awesome site!
Now on to our report. The resort was very busy the weekend we arrived (Wild Bunch) and then tapered off to a much smaller crowd the following week. It made for a more laid-back vacation than some previous trips, but we still had an outstanding time. We still didn’t have enough time to meet everyone, but we were able to get to know those we did.
The bus driver this trip really took his time getting us to the resort! We had 2 beer stops (ok, so one was due to too many beers from the first stop by a couple heading to Breezes for their wedding) and had to suffer a lecture on ganja. Apparently, the police are stopping random buses heading out of the airport and searching them for drugs….!
The days pretty much followed the same routine – up for breakfast (my favorite meal of the day!), off to the pool until lunch, then back to the main hall for lunch buffet and whatever entertainment may be going on, then back to the pool, nap, dinner, piano bar, and disco followed by whatever takes your fancy at the time. We were usually back to our room by 3 or 4 am with an exception or two.
Kevin stepped on a sea urchin the day we arrived, and being from Indiana, didn’t know you’re supposed to pee on it. The nurse tried to help with ammonia, but you can’t really do much. And the nurse wasn’t impressed with Kev’s “minor” run-in after comparing it to the couple who were rolling around on the rocks and had to deal with the pain all over!
I was the only one who dressed in costume for dinner on Friday. But by piano bar time, we were surrounded by sexy pirates, cats, and Chippendale dancers. And I did my first pole dance of our vacation at the disco which turned out to be the first of a nightly routine.
Saturday was rainy, so we actually learned to juggle and even played a game of BINGO! (Yikes – don’t tell anyone!) We also had the honor of meeting Jamaica Jim Jordan during our stay and enjoyed his company on several occasions.
I won 2nd place in the rump shaking contest on Glitz night. That’s only because the winner had the advantage of being next to the pole which she used shamelessly!!
Kev met up with a really nice alien lady that kept him company throughout the week….
We tried very hard to learn the reggae dance steps they taught on the nude side. Apparently Kev was very talented because he won 2nd place (was that a sympathy vote?) Then we moved on to the prude invasion where we indulged in silk panty shots (ICK!) and danced on the pool table. Rocky gave me knee burns from his enthusiastic doggie-style dancing, but I wasn’t complaining! This also was our first water slide of the trip, and I can’t believe we didn’t do more!
We were very lucky to be introduced to Screech and would HIGHLY recommend for the uninitiated!
We lounged around the pool Monday (or was that Tuesday?) We played a mean game of champagne volleyball, enjoyed a “loch ness” show worthy of popcorn, and I learned how to shoot water with my hands while Kev kayaked. We also tried the trapeze today for the first time in all our visits, and will go again on our next visit. The platform’s a lot higher when climbing up to it than it looks from the ground. Kev was a natural, but I fell forward when I should have fallen back, and I scraped up my knees on the net. Needless to say, Kev enjoyed explaining to all why my knees were all bruised up!
The floor show was a riot – there was yoga man, teeth man, big mama, limbo dancers and a flame thrower. Then we changed into short-shorts and headed to the piano bar where we (that would be me – Sam – and the unidentified “I’m a feisty bitch” other) enjoyed ordering many glasses of champagne from the bar.
We participated in tug of war and won despite injuries to our team. Kev oil-wrestled 2 gals and it was a close match until Kev did the proper thing and “surrendered.” They still felt the need to sit on him anyway, though!
PJ night was fun with lots of friends. And we laughed so hard with the mustache mishap we cried – couldn’t stand up for 20 minutes. Honestly, “it looked ok when you were lying on the bed.” Again, we indulged in a few new “firsts” of the trip… but all ended well (topless on the bar in the disco.)
The quad takeover was a little low-key, but we met some new friends, and played volleyball and watched as team members had to dance naked on the fountain (or even worse, the guy who wore the pink bikini!)
Kev’s flashy silver disco pants were a big hit, and I enjoyed distributing the daisy stickers I brought (required a “blow job” to properly apply!)
Friends starting departing Thursday, and so, in true Hedo fashion, we sent them off with a moon!
We discovered a new drink at the repeater party. Can’t remember the name or what was in it, but would recommend it! OK, it was green (no, it wasn’t Serena’s green shit) and it had like 10 ingredients, and I think it was called some guy’s name…? Anyway, we won an excursion, but didn’t have time to excurse. With a Saturday departure, we only had Friday and had already planned to snorkel.
Enjoyed dinner at Munahana’s with friends (“just use your spoon!”) before the toga show.
We did take the snorkel boat Friday morning and enjoyed the water very much. Visibility was good, and the fish are colorful. Spotted a few jellyfish that got us moving, but there weren’t a lot and we had no trouble.
Witnessed the wet t-shirt contest, and the girls did great! Sweetness was hysterically funny throughout the show, and when she was “volunteered” by a couple of girls on stage to receive a dirty dance, she accepted the challenge. Although, personally, my favorite part of the whole thing was dessert…!
Competed in the nude Olympics and my team, the cocksuckers, won. We had the biggest airbag… Moved on to Truth or Dare and I had to give a guy a hand job. Then I had a chance to display my artistic talent in the body-painting contest. Apparently, it’s lacking, because my canvass didn’t make it to the top 3. I think the crowd didn’t get the symbolism.
Our second masquerade night was a success. I (policewoman) had to handcuff Angel in the Piano bar for being naughty in her Catholic schoolgirl uniform. Cage dancing in the disco was fun this night. I have to learn that “hang upside down” trick before I go back….
Now on to some general topics:
Weather
I think this is the first time I’ve seen it rain NON-STOP for a full day (no breaks from 8am to 2am) followed by a couple of overcast days. Not that it really interfered with the party, but people were starting to stress over the lack of tanning! Although I did meet one person who managed a sunburn on a very cloudy day (thought for sure she’d combust when the sun came out!) The weather did contribute to the lack of most outdoor activities for the week – we had no dinner on the patio, no circus show, no dinner on the beach, no bonfire, and the beach games were moved indoors.
EC’s
Again lots of turnover since last December – LuAnne, Lust, Martin, Bootylicious and a couple of others are gone. New faces are Sassy and Rocky (yummy!) who have been there for about a month. Sly and Romeo (both are the BEST) are still there, and new last December but now veterans are Sweetness (was Kaydine), GQ (was Lehman), Angel, and Destiny. Teddy Bear is still around, but we didn’t see him much.
Hedo Crud
I (Sam) fought a sore throat and laryngitis all week, and Kevin got progressively worse with a cough and congestion. Some friendly well-stocked folks gave us some throats lozenges and those along with sleeping with the windows open helped some.
PDA’s
Yes, there were some PDA’s to be seen. And even though the EC’s were calling the Wild Bunch the “Mild” Bunch, they still put on a good show for the early part of our week that overlapped theirs. The f*** police were present and seemed somewhat discriminatory. Blowjobs were frequent and visible as the police walked past, but on the few rare occasions that the guys were pleasuring the girls, the police came out of their way to put a stop to it. Go figure.
Food
We ate a good many meals in Munahana’s and Pastafari’s this trip. The Japanese is a great change of pace from the usual buffet items. Don’t expect it to compete with your favorite local place, but they are improving, and Munahana’s remains my favorite. Pastafari’s did a good job changing their menu every few days, and the food is well-prepared. This is a great place for groups, too. Overall, we love the food – they have lots of seafood selections (snapper, marlin, tuna, and krab) and the jerk chicken and pork are great.
To wrap up, we had a very memorable vacation, met some TRULY wonderful people, and relaxed in a way we’ve not found possible anywhere else! I know you read it over and over in trip reports, but you have to go and see for yourself how the folks at Hedo really make your vacation great. Don’t be shy, say hi to the folks you pass, learn the names of those you meet, keep an open mind and you will have the best vacation of your life, and you’ll be counting the days until you return (196!)