Hazel
& Jaime Hedonism III Oct 27 - Nov 5, 2001
Jaime and I are both veterans of many a
Halloween at Hedo II, but this year we decided it was time to give Halloween
at Hedo III a try.
This trip report is being written for the
benefit of our Hedo II friends as a basis for comparison of the two resorts.
Hedo III veterans may just want to skip to the end of the report for
the final summary. Here goes
ARRIVAL
We took the 8:10 Air Jamaica flight from JFK
to MoBay, and arrived on time. Immigrations,
baggage claim, and Customs were a breeze, and off to the SuperClubs desk we
went to catch our bus. We were
loaded on to a bus within 5 minutes (WOW!!!) and were on our merry way to Hedo
III.
The bus ride was not horrible; in fact, it was
a lot easier than the ride to Negril. After
one pit-stop for beer and a potty break we were back on the road and we
arrived at Hedo III at around 1:30 in the afternoon.
Our room was not ready so we took our own
self-guided tour of the place and found the main dining room, the Scotch
Bonnet restaurant, the prude beach and dock, and the nude pool/beach area.
After a Hummingbird at the main bar and a jerk burger at the Jamaican
restaurant we reported back to the front desk for our room key.
We went to our room, called housekeeping to
come in and covert our two twin beds into a king (what were they thinking?)
and unpacked. It began to rain,
and since we were so exhausted we decided to have a little rest before dinner.
I guess we were more tired than we thought we were because we slept
through dinner and didn't wake up until the next morning.
ACCOMODATIONS
Our room was in the Quad (Room #213, Building
2 - yellow). It was one of the
so-called "swim-up" rooms I had heard about.
We could literally walk three steps from our room and fall in the pool.
The hot-tub was directly outside our room.
The quad pool is HUGE, with lots of "islands" of lounge
chairs, a swim-up bar, and a very large elevated sun deck which hovers over
the pool bar.
The room was 1000% nicer than the rooms at
Hedo II, but Uh-Oh!
we had two twin beds instead of the king-size bed we
were expecting. No problem, mon.
A call to housekeeping and a little while later (OK, about 2 hours
later) they came to convert our twins to a king.
The furnishings were much nicer than the rooms
at Hedo II. There was a double
dresser with six drawers, an open closet/dressing area, a small writing desk
with a chair (get this
there was a Bible in the drawer!) and a small
sitting area with two tub chairs and ottomans and a small coffee table with a
phone. The bed sits catty-corner in the room and it has a sort of
headboard/shelf which holds two lamps, a clock/radio and a radio/CD/tape
player. A wall-mounted combination TV/VCR with remote control was in the room
(something I hope to NEVER see at Hedo II.) The rain forced us indoors so
often that Jaime was especially thankful for the television in the room so
that he could keep up with the World Series and other sports.
Personally, I found that watching TV on my vacation was very boring
<yawn.>
The bathroom was bigger and laid out better
than the bathrooms at Hedo II. The
roman tub with the jacuzzi jets was really cool. The only problem with the tub was
since I am short (only
4' 11") I found it difficult getting into the tub without sitting on the
edge first and swinging my legs into the tub.
Getting out was no problem. Jaime (6' 1") was too tall to sit
comfortably in the tub with me when we wanted to check out the jacuzzi jets
hee hee. It was strictly
showers for us for the rest of our stay.
The air conditioner in the room was mounted
high up on the wall, making it necessary to use the supplied remote control to
operate it. It took a while to
figure out the remote, but after that we had a perfect climate in the room,
albeit a little damp. I
discovered some condensation in my camera, which made it useless for the
entire trip. It was about mid-way
through the vacation when I realized there was a "dry" setting on
the A/C. Go figure.
Other amenities in the room were an iron,
ironing board, and a few shelves in the closet area. A wall-mounted blow dryer (located in the dressing area
not in the bathroom) was available, but really useless when it comes to drying
my very thick hair. I knew I
should have brought my 2000-watt blow dryer from home, but I was afraid I'd
blow out the power in the whole resort. Still,
it was a tad better than the blow dryers at Hedo II, but not much.
Speaking of blowing out the power
there
were numerous brief moments when the power went out, but it came back on again
almost immediately every time it went out.
They must have one kick-ass back-up generator there.
The only problem was that our clock kept needing to be re-set, which
was a real drag. Helpful hint:
bring a 9-volt battery to put into your room clock.
If the power goes out, the battery will provide back-up power to your
clock. Same goes for the clocks
in the rooms at Hedo II.
WEATHER
Excuse my bluntness, but the weather sucked.
It was partly sunny the day we arrived, and again the next morning when
we went to breakfast and orientation. After
that, the rain started and never seemed to end.
There were short periods in the morning and early afternoon with hazy
sun. There was only one day when
the sun was actually shining brightly and unobstructed by clouds
but that
was short-lived
only about an hour and a half.
I guess that it was Hurricane Michelle who dumped so much rain on us.
She even kicked up the surf quite a bit, enough to cause the Jamaican
restaurant to be closed on our last day there.
Waves were crashing over the rock jetties (spelling?) which line the
nude beach and pool areas, the Wedding Gazebo, the boardwalk and the boat dock
on the prude beach. I was
practically drowned one afternoon as I sat in a lounge chair at the nude pool
and a HUGE wave came over the railing and completely drenched me, my chair,
towels, and beach bag. How rude!
Torrential rain caused some flooding in the
dining room, Scotch Bonnet, and the lobby.
Walking on the beautiful tiled decks was treacherous because they are
so slippery, but I was warned to expect that.
I walked on all wet surfaces with little baby-steps all week. I was
forced to wear my water shoes almost all the time, even to dinner.
How chic (yeah, right!)
DINING FACILITIES & FOOD
The main Terrace dining room was very lovely,
but it was way too small for the number of people staying at the resort, even
though the resort was only about half-full.
Meals are served the same way they are at Hedo II, buffet-style.
The exposed-beam cathedral ceiling and skylight were gorgeous, but they
leaked very badly during the hard rains.
Just like at Hedo II, there were towels on the floor everywhere to
absorb all the leaks.
The dining chairs are much more comfortable
than at Hedo II. You don't sink
into the chairs and end up with the table at chin-level like you would at Hedo
II, where the seats consist of a flimsy cushion on a sagging web frame.
The food quality is a whole lot better than at
Hedo II. The buffet always had a
variety of items, and I always found something that I liked.
We had breakfast in the main dining room every
day. Jaime loved the omelets, and
my favorite items were the pancakes.
We had dinner in the main dining room a few
times. I always enjoyed the
snapper and the salad bar. Jaime
liked most everything he ate there too.
Almost all of our lunches were eaten at the
Scotch Bonnet, which we thoroughly enjoyed.
Jaime's favorite was the chicken burgers, while I enjoyed the jerk
burgers and beef patties. The
jerk chicken was also excellent, as was the conch chowder. Yum! Cornelius
was our favorite waiter in the Scotch Bonnet.
He kept on bringing us pi๑a coladas topped off with Coruba rum, even
when we didn't ask for them, just because he knew we enjoyed them.
What a guy!
The nude beach grill made excellent
hamburgers. I have to admit they
better than Robert's at Hedo II because of the soft buns and the REAL
ketchup!!! There are bowls on
condiment packets at the nude grill: mustard, mayo, hot dog relish, and YES
real Heinz ketchup
woo hoo!!! We
also like to snack on the nachos with chili and cheese from the nude beach
grill. The so-called
"cheese" was edible, but I don't think it was really cheese.
It had the consistency of a hollandaise sauce, but it tasted okay, so
we ate it anyway. At least it
didn't make either of us sick.
Jaime's favorite restaurant was the Japanese
restaurant, Munahana; we ate there twice. The menu is fixed and consists of a
salad with a very tasty dressing (I couldn't identify the ingredients in it,
but I loved it), miso soup, sushi, andtempura shrimp and veggie appetizers.
The entr้e was a choice of seafood (shrimp and terriyaki snapper -- my
favorite), chicken, or beef (or any combination of these items) with
stir-fried veggies and rice. Dessert
was green tea mousse, which sounds terrible, but was actually very good.
We ate there for the first time on Jaime's birthday (Nov. 2) and
thoroughly enjoyed the meal and the company. Service
was excellent. My water glass was
constantly refilled before it ever got empty.
The Jamaican chef who cooked our meals was very amusing despite
the fact that he was speaking to us in a fake Japanese accent.
The Italian restaurant, Pastafari, is more
favorably compared to its namesake at Hedo II. We also ate there twice.
The seating arrangements here are more spread apart here, so we were
never sitting too close to the other patrons.
The service was also much faster than at Hedo II.
Jaime enjoyed the filet mignon at both meals.
I ordered a chicken dish the first time, which was very good, except
that there was a bone protruding from my so-called "cutlet."
I did not enjoy my second meal there, which was the fettucine with
seafood in a tomato cream sauce. The
sauce was just not "Italian" enough for me.
Even though I love spicy food, I don't expect my pasta sauce to be
spicy. Maybe the fact that I wasn't feeling well that evening
affected my appetite and my taste buds, because I could not finish the pasta.
Frankly, I don't know why I ordered the fettucine because I have never
enjoyed any of the pasta at Hedo II either.
Oh well, I'll know better in the future.
BAR SERVICE
The bar service was very good.
We never had to wait very long to get a bartender's attention at the
main bar, the piano bar, or at the disco.
Our favorite waiter at the Scotch Bonnet (sheesh, can't remember his
name) always had our Coruba coladas refilled whenever we finished them
even if we didn't ask for it. The
only negative was that they would not ignite our "flaming" Bob
Marleys for us. They said it was against the rules. Also, they added orange juice to the Bob Marley, which is a
No-No as far as I'm concerned. There
is NO orange juice in the Flaming Bob Marleys at Hedo II. Also, the Hummingbirds were not as good as the ones we get
from Paulette at the Prude Beach bar at Hedo II.
ENTERTAINMENT STAFF
Contrary to what I'd heard about the EC's at
Hedo III, they were very friendly and helpful.
It was absolutely fabulous to see Marie (formerly of Hedo II) there.
Her "stage" name at Hedo III is "Exotica".
My favorite coordinators were Marie, Carol (aka Tina Turner, Caramel,
and Climax
this girl had lots of names!), and Dangerous.
DISCO
The Octopussy Disco is really cool. It's
bigger than the one at Hedo II. The
bar is in the same room as the disco, and it has a pole for anyone who wants
to do a pole dance on it. There
is also a cage for people to dance and/or perform in.
The music is very loud and it is the same type of mix that they play at
Hedo II.. The only bad thing about the disco is that you have to go upstairs
to get to it, which would be dangerous if one were a bit tipsy or if the
stairs were wet because of rain. The
restrooms are at the back of the disco, not downstairs as I had read in some
old trip reports.
HALLOWEEN
The entertainment staff really did a great job
for the Halloween festivities, which was very much like it is done at Hedo II.
There were prizes given out for door and window decorations in the
guest rooms. There was also a costume contest in which guests could earn
free nights for he best costumes in different categories. Noticeably absent from the category list was "Most
Disgusting" which is always eagerly anticipated at Hedo II.
The costumes were very creative and lots of fun.
KINK IN THE CARIBBEAN
Kink in the Caribbean is a fetish group that
goes to Hedo III every year in October. Our
travel agent warned us that some of her clients were very upset last year
about this group's outrageous displays of bondage, S&M, domination, etc.
It seems that last year they did some things that were disturbing to
some of the guests (such as Saran-wrapping a man to a tree and spanking a
woman to the point of tears on one of the tables in the Pastafari.)
We saw none of that. They
were a friendly group of people who appeared at dinner every night in their
fetish-wear. There was one guy
who walked around on his hands and knees wearing a saddle and reigns.
His mistress rode him like a horse everywhere, tied him to a chair
while she socialized with others, and allowed other guests to pet and ride her
"horsey." He seemed
very comfortable in his role. They
were very happy to pose for pictures for everyone.
The resort must have given the Kink people a
couple of suites to use as their "dungeon." This is where their private, members-only activities took
place. No outsiders were allowed
to enter their little world. I
presume this was in order to avoid offending some of the guests who would not
be comfortable witnessing their activities.
The Kink group put on a fashion show one
afternoon during the "Midday Madness" (Hedo III's version of Hedo
II's "Lunchtime Spin.") They
also put on a comedy/magic/fetish show one night at dinner.
All in all we found them very entertaining and
not offensive at all.
SHOPPING
The stores at Hedo III sucked.
They didn't actually have a real shop.
There were two rooms in Building 1 (the green building in the Quad)
which were converted to shops. They
were very tiny and badly laid out. They
offered the usual t-shirts, thermal mugs, booze, and sundries.
However, there was construction going on in a
closed-off area adjacent to the Quad buildings. We found out that they were building two "shoppes".
They were expected to be complete by the first of the year.
It looked like the workers were making very good progress on the job.
SPA SERVICES
The spa services do not compare to those at
Hedo II. While the spa itself is
very nice and comfortable, they only offer basic and french manicures and
pedicures, Swedish full-body massage (1/2 hour or full hour), or a 1/2-hour
back and neck massage. They do
not offer body scrubs or acrylic fill-ins like at Hedo II.
I was very annoyed when I could not get my acrylic nails repaired
there. However, there is a sauna
and a steam room at Hedo III which they don't have at Hedo II.
Maybe when the new spa (currently under construction) is done at Hedo
II it will have a sauna and a steam room.
Who knows?
GUESTS
We met a few really nice people at Hedo III.
There was no one who ever really annoyed us, except for all those
people who partied until the early morning hours
every night
in the
hot tub directly outside our room. They
were extremely loud and obnoxious, as they were mostly drunk.
Their voices kept echoing in the Quad, which seemed to amplify every
sound. We like to party as much
as every one else, but we both work very hard and value the few precious hours
of sleep we can get each night. It
was practically impossible to sleep on any given night if you had a room in
the Quad.
There was no evidence of Vinnies or Wallies.
Mostly all the guests were couples.
We noticed many single girls, but not many single guys.
That was very unusual, as at Hedo II, the guys outnumber the girls all
the time.
We did not form any friendships with the other
guests we met. At Hedo II
it seems that I always leave there with a minimum of two or three new e-mail
addresses of people to keep in touch with.
That didnt happen for us at Hedo III.
SUMMARY
Jaime and I were both really impressed with
the resort facilities, restaurants, rooms, etc. The place is gorgeous, the
food is awesome (better than at Hedo II) and the staff is really attentive and
courteous.
Jaime definitely would like to go back again.
It seemed to be a better value for the money we spent, especially since
the construction at Hedo II is going result in (what threatens to be) a
whopping rate increase.
As for me, I like the physical beauty of the
resort, the staff was really wonderful, and the food was excellent.
But I missed my Hedo II family tremendously.
The 'vibe' that I always talk about when describing Hedo II to non-Hedonites
was seriously lacking at Hedo III.
In all fairness, I was also very bored because
the weather was so awful. One of
my main priorities when I am on vacation is to soak up as many rays as
possible and get a nice tan. I
did not get to do this.
However, I'd be willing to give the place another try because I know Jaime would like to go back again. However, it might be fun if we brought some of our Hedo II family with us. It might also be fun to try to go when during the non-rainy season.