First (Rookie) trip to Hedonism III and we came from Asheville, NC.
1/25/02-Friday Up at 4:00 a.m. Went to the Asheville airport, checked in, got tickets. Our friends, Lowell and DeAnna also going on the same flights with us, that made traveling much more fun. Waited for plane. Flew to Charlotte, ate some breakfast there during 4 hour layouver. Caught plane to Montego Bay. Finally arrived in Jamaica and cleared customs, etc. Declined beer and ganja salesmen. Baggage handler, driver not afraid to ask for money. (A lot of tipping for an all-inclusive resort I thought.) Rode shuttle bus to resort stopping for drinks and listening to tourist spiel. Driver admonished DeAnna for talking and not listening to his canned speech. Arrived and checked in. Got rooms around the corner from Lowell and DeAnna, with ocean view overlooking nude pool area. Went to nude pool & hot tub. Had a few too many drinks on an empty stomach and got rather tipsy. THad to take a bath in the spa tub with the window open and the sea breeze blowing in, it was very nice. Met others from Hedo Libido group (TJ and Jane, Lee and Cathy and Lowell and DeAnna at our table) at Pastafarian Italian restaurant and had great time and very raucous dinner with them while Liz and the other Hedo Libidos at the next table over seemed very quiet in comparison. Got into costumes for Masquerade night jungle theme, but were too early for the disco so we went to piano bar for awhile for some drinks and then to the disco. Allyson was so happy to be going topless until she noticed no one else was and then all of a sudden became self conscious so I gave her my Tarzan head band for a top but then my long hair fell in my eyes as I danced. Danced for about 5 or 10 minutes until Allyson got tired and sleepy. Sat and tried and to talk but the music was so loud we strained our voices yelling and went outside, then Allyson wanted to go back to room. I was in room and Allyson, not being used to staying up past 11:00 pm, was fast asleep. Got bored and went to look for our friends but didn't find them. The weight room was empty, so I stayed in there awhile (I like the rubber dumb bells, no clanking noises). Got ice. Walked all around resort. Never found anyone I knew. Grudgingly went to bed around 0245, closed the bathroom door so the sounds of laughter from the hot tub below wouldn't keep me awake.
1/26/02-Saturday Up at 0700. Went for walk around resort with video camera to capture what the layout looked like since there wasn't much else I could really put on tape. There wasn't a soul around, figured most probably just went to bed a few hours ago. Went with Allyson to breakfast bufffet. We wanted to SCUBA dive but haven't really been since we went to Jamaica in 1991, so even though we are certified we went to take the resort dive course as a refresher. After a brief classroom (if the Scotch Bonnet is a classroom) instruction, we went to the main pool (which was freezing) to complete the in the water part of it. Finished just in time to go on 1100 dive. Went out on the dive boat but Allyson got dizzy with vertigo when she went over backwards into the water and she came back into the boat. I went ahead with the other divers and saw the sunken ship and coral and fish and the usual things, very nice views. Got back to resort and finally caught up with Lowell and DeAnna whom we had not seen since the disco Friday night. Went with them to eat lunch of jerk chicken at the Scotch Bonnet. We went to the nude beach for awhile. To room to bathe and dressed up for red white & blue night. Had dinner at the dinner buffet, I thought the food was really good, but not as much as Lowell since he ate seven of the grilled lobsters! Ate with Liz and made her talk to yet another single guy we found who was disappointed (we heard a lot of complaints from single men who felt they ad been duped into thinking this was some single girl paradise with nymphomaniacs hanging from the trees and instead found a bunch of married couples). I went to disco with Lowell and Deanna but Allyson didn't want to go because she had a headache and went to room to lie down. I felt like big third wheel but they felt sorry for me after I spent day complaining I didn't get to do anything fun last night. Hung out in the disco some and watched people. We got in hot tub for awhile. Left them and went to weight room for awhile. Eventually went back to room and went to sleep around 0300 or so.
01/27/02 - Sunday Up at 0700. Took shower. Went to breakfast buffet with Allyson. Back to room to get ready for morning deep dive. Came back to breakfast table and saw Allyson was talking to some Canadian guys who were also complaining that the resort mislead them into thinking it was a place for single guys to meet horny single women. Left them to go on deep dive at 0900. Lowell and Deanna ate with Allyson since she couldn't dive and they went to the nude beach. Only me, Lee and some loudmouth, were on dive. Went down 90 feet, it was fun, decided to go again tomorrow. Back, met others on beach. Went to nude pool, ate lunch of cheeseburgers there. Went to dinner with Lowell and Deanna and Steve & Pauline from England at Pastafarian. Had super, marvelous time talking to them and sharing cross cultural references, really brill people. This time we seemed to be the reserved table and the other Hedos in the corner were the boisterous crowd. Said hit to them on the way out. Didn't go to disco, Teri told us Battle of the Sexes was some contests doing dishes or making a bed in timed competition, sounded like the kind of thing work we were getting away from. Went to nude hot tub with Lowell and Deanna and saw Harry who we had met on the plane, he won the trip in a contest but had to come alone. Lowell and Deanna left to check e-mail and didn't come back. We were going to go change and go to the disco, but made the mistake of laying down and went to sleep, never to be seen the rest of the night.
01/28/02 - Monday Up at 0700. Went to breakfast buffet. Saw Lowell and Deanna going out for day trip to somewhere. Left Allyson and went on deep dive at 0900, more people on dive this time, had Lee as buddy again which was good, but obnoxious guy was there too which wasn't. After dive, went to find Allyson. She was at the nude beach but I didn't want to be nude after a cold dive, so we left and went over to the quad pool just to see what it was like. There was no one there and we sat in the hot tub some and in the sun some but were bored. We walked around looking for things to do. We went to the gift shop and saw TJ there. We went to the front desk on the off chance that someone turned in the jacket and book Allyson left on the shuttle Friday, and were pleased to find they did and they had been holding it ever since. We went down the waterslide finally which was a lot of fun even with a swimming suit on and in the daytime, had drinks by the pool and were going to play billiards in the pool but got roped into playing pool volleyball (my team won, Allyson' team lost). We ate lunch at the lunch buffet. We went to the nude beach again. Then walked over to the watersports shed to go on a glass bottom boat ride with Harry and his new friend Dorothy. That lasted a half hour and we went back to the nude pool. Our other friends were there at the pool bar licking drinks off their wives. They finally talked Allyson into doing it too. Finally Dee and Lowell showed up around 4:30 p.m., we hadn't seen them all day. This was our last full day at the resort and I wanted to did not want to waste it sleeping again. We sat in hot tub for awhile and played games like "I have Never" with the resort director of that kind of thing. Then went off to change for dinner. We had reservations at Munahana Japanese restaurant with TJ and Jane, Lee and Cathy and Lowell and Deanna. We had a nice dinner and conversation with hot sake afterwards. Then we met Kathy and Don and Steve and Pauline outside at the main bar and started doing buttery nipple shots and the girls all started trying to lick their nipples, it was very funny. Then we all went to the nude hot tub, then we had more shots in the hot tub, but Lowell and I didn't drink ours to keep conscious. Left hot tub to get dressed for 70s night. Put on my Elvis outfit and met up with Lowell and Dee at the Piano bar. Did some Elvis songs, which was fun. We left after awhile and went to the disco shaking hands all along the way (when you're dressed as Elvis, people like to pretend you really are Elvis so I had to stay in character the whole time). I danced with Allyson some, but those four months in age she has on me got the best of her and she got tired and sick and had to rest and go outside. I wanted to stay a little longer and eventually dance with Dee some but my polyester Elvis wig didn't absorb sweat very well so I kept flinging it on her. Went to look for Allyson and found she was just outside. We all left there and went to the hot tub. Stayed there a long time and then Allyson got tired and went to bed. Eventually just me and Dee and Lowell left. I told them both good night around 0330 and went on to bed. They later said they had fallen asleep on the beach and woke up there.
01/29/02 Awake at 0800. Packed up bags and put outside room and went to Lowell and DeAnna's room to see if they were ready then went to breakfast. Ate and talked to other poor souls departing. Went to nude beach to have photos taken next to the sign that says "No Photo Taking". Checked out and waited for shuttle to airport. We arrived in Montego Bay airport. Got tickets, went through security and bought booze and canvas bag to carry it all in while waiting. Through more security, then boarded plane. Arrived early in Charlotte. Had to go through customs and even more damn security. Went to our gate, Lowell and I got some pizza and drinks and brought it to the girls. Ate and talked about the fun we had. Boarded our plane to Asheville. Arrived right on time. Got home and got kids back and messages and stacks of mail and unpacked and came back to reality. All in all, we liked the resort and the people we met were really great, we made lots of good, new friends. But if we can't enjoy the nightlife, maybe we should go to a resort more Allyson's speed like Wheezes or Grand Geritol. Thanks for the fun times everyone!