Hedonism III Trip Report- March 4-11, 2001
Kevin and Pamela
My wife and I went the SuperSurprise+ route and ended up
going to HedoIII earlier this month. Most trip reports tend to deal with the
details of the trip but since we have been back for a couple of weeks I really
only wanted to go back over the general impressions and memories that still
linger. Let’s give it a go…
To get personal, I am 43 and my wife is 31. In the past
we have generally done Club Meds or all-inclusives in Mexico or Martinique and
we try not to go back to the same place twice. This time around, however, I
had a strong urge to do something a bit different. I have to admit that
Jamaica seemed particularly attractive and that I had a secret urge to go to a
Hedonism resort but I couldn’t quite summon up the courage to book it
directly. The SuperSuprise option seemed like a nice way to test the fates- if
I was meant to go to Hedo then that is what would happen. After some
deliberation we eliminated Breezes MoBay and left the rest in the hands of
fate.
We booked through Air Canada Vacations and had to
overnight in Toronto on the way down. Since we were leaving on a Saturday I
freely acknowledge that I was going a bit squirrelly as the day approached.
Our travel agent was pestering Air Canada and I was calling SuperClubs but in
the end we didn’t get final confirmation until Friday. Our TA was actually
afraid to call us to tell us the news, fearing that we were going to panic at
the thought of going to a Hedo. Since this was my absolutely first choice, I
couldn’t have been happier.
The trip and arrival were uneventful. The only comment
here is that you need to have a few bucks in your pocket since a local porter
takes your bags out to the SuperClubs van/bus and you will invariably stop on
the way for a drink and a quick chance to do some shopping at a rest station.
It delays your arrival and I know that some people may not appreciate it but
the stop was generally pleasant. The bus driver will make a pitch for a tip as
well, so having a few small bills in U.S. currency is a good idea.
When we arrived at the resort the first impression that I
had was that the guests lounging around the reception area looked WAY more
relaxed and comfortable than I did. There was an air of…slowness- almost a
sense of languid fluidity in the way they moved. I felt pale, tense, and
brittle next to them.
We were given a room in the quad area- a group of four
buildings arranged in a square with a pool, hot tub, bar, and elevated tanning
area in the middle. The slog up the stairs to the third floor seemed almost
punishing and I immediately thought that I would be running back to reception
within the hour to request a room change. My wife, on the other hand, liked
the room (336) and the view from above and suggested that we keep it- so we
did. I should add, however, that I did go down and ask if we could move and
was told that it wouldn’t be a problem. I quizzed the girl behind the
reception desk one evening and asked her where she would stay if she had a
choice. She suggested that she would probably stay in the quad because it was
quieter- the nude pool and hot tub area can be noisy deep into the night and
they regularly get requests from people who want to move to a room further
away from it.
Is there a preferred building in the quad area? I liked
the one we were in- it was closer to the main restaurant and some distance
from the hot tub- but everyone seems to have a different opinion. Being up a
bit higher made it quieter as well, so I never did get the sense that being on
the ground floor and being able to walk out to the pool would have been much
of an advantage.
We went out for a walk after unpacking and did a tour of
the grounds. We had arrived around suppertime so it was already getting dark.
That evening after dinner my wife was ‘grabbed’ by the entertainment staff
and taken down to the stage area to participate in the men vs. women
challenge. I quickly followed. The competition was fun, a bit raunchy, and a
nice way to break the ice. I would encourage anyone who has never been to a
Hedo to give it a whirl.
We went up to the disco around 11:00 p.m. and sat
outside. If you haven’t been to the resort it may help to know that you have
to go up a set of stairs that wind around one of the hot tubs (the glass
bottomed one) and then cross a little bridge to get to the disco. There is a
patio area that also includes a bar- at times there are even bartenders
available to get you a drink. A circular staircase goes up from this patio to
the roof and the entrance to the waterslide so if you feel inclined to drop
your gear and do a little naked sliding you have to go past the disco
entrance.
In any event…there was a group of people sitting at a
table that seemed to be having a good time. I would NEVER approach a table of
people in a bar ordinarily but somehow it seemed acceptable at Hedo so I asked
if we could sit with them. They said ‘absolutely’, grabbed some chairs,
and soon we were all introduced. Dave and Tam, Steve and Kayla, David and Kas,
Andrew and Chantal, Andy and Sarah…what a great group of people. We ended up
hanging out with some or all of them throughout the balance of the week and it
really made things special.
I wasn’t planning on getting into the details but seem
to have done so anyway. Let’s get a few more of them out of the way.
What DIDN’T I like? It took me about 5 days to get my
internal pace revved low enough to handle the way Jamaicans do…anything. The
ability to multi-task is completely absent. It certainly helps to pack a bunch
of patience when you leave home and take liberal doses of it during your stay.
The service was generally very good but only if you didn’t expect anything
to get done quickly. We were left standing for a good 30 minutes in the foyer
of the Italian restaurant because some ‘older’ couple wandered in with
their plates of food from the buffet area and sat at the table that we were
going to be seated at. Ahhh…a long story not worth repeating.
What DID I like? The atmosphere. There was an atmosphere
of smiling relaxation mixed in with a definite auto of sexuality. Were there
wild, public, and potentially lewd acts taking place? Actually…it depends on
your point of view and whether you were in the right (wrong) place at the
right time. Two girls put on a show in the hot tub outside the disco one
evening that attracted a crowd of middle aged males. It culminated with one
girl crawling naked across the bridge and patio toward the disco while the
other whipped her bottom with a towel. Outrageous? Actually, most people in
the vicinity barely paused in their conversations to give it a glance.
The weather was fairly good during our week although it
was a bit colder in the evening than I had expected. It would have been nice
if the air conditioning in the disco could have been turned down or off- it
felt like a refrigerator on several evenings- but after awhile you come to
realize that there is a difference between the staff telling you that they
will attend to something and anything actually getting accomplished.
We did both the Italian and Japanese restaurants and
thought the food was excellent in both. The only complaint might have been the
dreaded air conditioning once again. The Italian restaurant was freezing, but
that may have been a problem that others seated elsewhere wouldn’t have
noticed.
The in the main restaurant was good, although like all
buffets it was a bit predictable. We stopped back in after the disco on a
couple of occasions and found enough variety to keep us happy. One evening we
even went to the main desk around 5:00 a.m. and got a sandwich plate so there
was never a time when we lacked for food or drink.
My wife assured me that she had no intentions of hanging
out in the nude area but that quickly changed when we got there. We spent most
of the week out on the piers (jetties) that extend into the ocean on either
side of the nude beach. Most people crowd around the nude pool and hot tub but
we enjoyed the breeze off the ocean, the sound of the surf, and the quietness.
After a few days it was almost painful to put clothes back on- not because of
a sunburn but because it is just so much nicer to be ‘au naturale’.
If you haven’t done the ‘nude thing’ and think that
you might be uncomfortable with it, keep two things in mind. First, for some
strange reason people are much friendlier when they aren’t wearing clothes.
Not suggestive/leering friendlier but honest-to-goodness nicer. When everyone
is on a level playing ground- no one has a nicer bathing suit or fancier
shoes- most pretenses are dropped. People look you in the eye during
conversations and generally don’t give a hoot what you look like since there
is nothing left to the imagination anyway. We met some terrific people as a
result.
We didn’t go on any excursions, participated in a few
of the games, and went on a quick catamaran ride with one of the water sports
staff. We had hoped to try a scuba dive but neither of us is open water
certified although we have completed the PADI closed water course. The intro
lessons just seemed like more work than they were worth.
The beaches at Hedo III leave something to be desired if,
like me, you enjoy bodysurfing and smooth white sand. Still, most people at
all inclusive-type resorts end up hanging around the pool anyway so it wasn’t
that big of a deal.
Did we enjoy our trip? Very much. We went to bed between
3:30 a.m. and 5:30 a.m. every night and were up at 8:30 or 9:00 in the
morning, ready to do it all over again. The people were great, the resort is
lovely, the rooms are large and inviting (even if the color schemes just reek
of Las Vegas), the food was plentiful and very tasty (especially the jerk),
the drinks flowed (bring a BIG insulated glass for daytime use), and we just
loved the whole experience. When we were getting organized to leave at the end
of the week I found that I had turned into one of those people that I had
noticed upon our arrival. I was tanned and relaxed and was moving so slowly
that the new arrivals all seemed like people from another planet. I thought,
“You have no idea…”.
Would I go back? Not a day has gone by that I haven’t
spent some time wondering when I will get my butt back to Jamaica, throw off
my clothes, and fill up some large container with a Mudslide or Dirty Banana
and get irie once again. That would be, as they say, no problem.