Hedonism II The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly
By Richard & Jean
We spent a week at Hedonism II Negril Jamaica in January. This was our first trip to Jamaica and our first experience with a SuperClubs resort. Before we made reservations we read all the trip reports we could find on the internet, and as a way of saying thanks, we have decided to offer our observations as a guide to anyone thinking of visiting this resort.
Our plane landed at MoBay after dark so we had no choice but to take the bus that we had been warned about. Clearance through Jamaican Customs was quick and effortless, and we immediately departed on the SuperClubs van. The driver had a heavy foot, but otherwise the ride was not as bad as we had expected, and certainly not as wild as we have experienced on other Caribbean islands. Of course they drive on the left side of the road in Jamaica. We were standing in the Hedo front lobby exactly one hour and 50 min after our plane touched down.
Check-in was likewise quick, and our luggage was waiting for us when we got to our room. We had reserved a room on the prude side since we were told that was all that was available. We were pleasantly surprised to find that we were on the nude side.
We had supper on the plane, but even though it was getting late, we couldn't resist the tempting fare laid out in the dining room. We arrived during the toga party, so were not surprised at some of the "costumes" that people were wearing. Few had any resemblance to a Roman toga. The winner of the most revealing toga was basically naked. We thought that the whole thing was very funny, and not at all offensive.
The "entertainment" the next evening was a different story. About ten couples were divided into two teams and asked to demonstrate as many sexual positions as they could think of. I won't describe it any further, except that we thought that the MC let things get carried away. But the worst happened after the evenings entertainment was over and most of the guests had left. Four "ladies" performed sex acts on four men on the dance floor. Either the resort staff didn't notice, or didn't care. There were several other times during our stay that we observed activities in the dining area that should have been left to the privacy of ones room.
The Tuesday night pyjama party was a disaster as far as we were concerned. First, the resort had sold a lot of extra tickets to people staying at other hotels, and as a result there wasn't enough tables for everyone. Then it rained, so none of the outside tables could be used, and some of the inside tables got wet too (there are no walls on the dining room). The resort made an announcement that during supper genitals must be covered, but some people ignored that, and the resort made no attempt to enforce their own rule. Then some of the professional entertainers hired by the resort did what I would consider to be an indecent performance. (We were told later that one of the performers had appeared in several porn movies). At that point we got up and left. To add insult to injury, friends who stayed for the whole evening told us that the judging for the best pyjamas etc. had been rigged so that only members of the Lifestyle group (swingers) could win. When we complained to the management about the Tuesday nights events we were told that they wouldn't do anything because that is what the Lifestylers wanted.
At least the Lifestylers didn't pester us. Nobody suggested that we participate in any kind of activity that we would feel uncomfortable with. We quit going to the nude hot tub after the second night because of the antics going on there, and because we were concerned about what might be in the water, but there is another hot tub on the prude side. One couple did invite us to join a new swingers club starting up in our area, but let the subject drop when we said no thanks. The only unsavory proposition came from a single male guest who we suspected was making a porno video. He asked us to bring an "empty" cigar box through customs for him. Of course we are not quite that stupid, and at first assumed that it would have been filled with the pot that was so readily available. But then we met two other couples who had been asked to perform various sex acts so he could video tape them. (They both turned him down). His room overlooked the nude pool, so he probably got all the "scenery" he wanted just out his window.
But our experience at Hedo II certainly wasn't all bad. The food in the main dining area was excellent (except for the Argentinean wine), and the service was very good. We ate twice in the Pastafera Restaurant, and it was absolutely first class both times. The beach is good too, although it is better on the prude side. The resort is neat and well maintained, and our room was clean and comfortable. Our only complaint, and a minor one, was that the hot water pressure fluctuated quite a bit, so it was impossible to maintain an even temperature in the shower. There was a candle in our room for use in the event of a power failure, but there were no power interruptions when we were there. The CD player in the rooms was a nice touch. We brought three of our favourite CDs to provide soft relaxing mood music. About 80% of the guests were using the nude beach/pool area, so these facilities tended to be crowded, but this left the same facilities on the prude side nearly deserted. The prude pool is bigger and deeper besides. One thing that surprised us was that we didn't see anyone intoxicated, even though there was no limit on the excellent drinks. This was our first experience at a nude resort, but it took us all of 30 seconds to get used to the idea of wandering around in the buff.
We came to the conclusion that it didn't matter very much whether the we were in a room on the nude or prude side. The rooms are the same, and the garden or beach views are just as nice. The only advantage was a slightly shorter walk to the nude beach and pool. The prude pool is in the centre of the resort near the dining area, and the nude pool is at one extreme edge.
We went for several long walks down the beach. It is beautiful white sand and mostly deserted in the early morning.Several of the neighbouring resorts employ security guards (as does Hedo), but they didnt mind us walking the beach. Occasionally they would ask where we were staying and where we were going. When we told them they always answered with "no problem mon".
There are so many sports facilities that we didn't have time to try them all out. We didn't get to the tennis courts, nor the trapeze even though professional instruction was available. We had fun snorkelling on the reef offshore. There is an old anchor and cannon there, so there must be an old shipwreck in the vicinity, although we didn't see it. One afternoon a bunch of us hired a boat and went sightseeing and snorkelling down the coast to Rick's Cafe and the lighthouse. It was too rough to land at Rick's, but we got a good view of people diving off the cliffs. There are a lot of caves, one was big enough to drive the whole boat in. We spent a lot of time sailing. They had three different kinds of boats available including some of the new Escapes.
Everyone was very friendly and pleasant to talk to. We met people from England, France, Switzerland and Cyprus, as well as all parts of the US and Canada. Before we went to Hedo we posted our names on Denny's page and exchanged emails with two other couples that had done the same. The six of us hung out together most of the time. We all became good friends. They made our stay much more enjoyable.
We decided to take the bus back too, but we did talk to a charter airline (Aero Express) who quoted us a price of $50.00 each one way in a Cessna 206. The bus turned out to be a wise decision as the driver drove with care and obeyed most of the speed limits. The scenery was nice, and we had an opportunity to see a little bit of the real Jamaica. The only problem was that we drove through MoBay at rush hour. Talk about grid lock! I will never complain about rush hour again.
We didn't know about the swingers when we made our reservations, and we now realise that January is not the best time to visit Hedo if you are not into that "lifestyle". We were prepared for the activities going on in the nude hot tub and pool area, but we were not prepared for the resort management condoning these indecent acts performed publicly in the dining room and stage area. It was easy to avoid the nude hot tub in the evenings, but we couldnt avoid the dining room. If I could offer one bit of advice for the SuperClubs management, it would be that they need to enforce a dress and conduct code in the main dining area.
Vacationing at Hedo was sure different from anything we have experienced at any other resort that we have visited. It was a vacation that we will never forget.
Many thanks to Richard & Jean. - Denny